Entitlement? Entitlement.

Imagine that you spent almost a year working very hard on a weekly event within a community, to build it up, and attract people to come to that event. Imagine that you dedicated quite a lot of time to that event each week, taking pictures for it, showcasing the special things that would be there, advertising to remind people to come.

Imagine that it was a labor of love for you, not something that you did for any substantial profit, but something that you put your heart into just because it made you happy and it made some other people happy, too.

And then imagine that someone who used to hold that same kind of event prior to you, on the same day, at the same time, decided suddenly that they wanted to return to hosting that event, on the same day, at the same time, after being absent just over a year. Imagine that, when that person was told that you were already hosting that event on that day & time, and that it might not be appropriate that they ask you to give it up, given that you had spent so much time and effort, and that you loved it, that the person returning just decided they were going to proceed with their plans, anyway, without even speaking to you first to see if you could come to some sort of agreement.

How would you feel? Would you feel small, maybe? Insignificant?

Let’s use our imagination a little bit more. Humor me, please.

Let’s imagine that you, having had no contact from this other party, decided that you would feel better about the situation if you made the attempt to extend an olive branch of sorts. Let’s say that you spoke with them, and you compromised with them. It all worked out peacefully and amicably between the two of you. But, let’s say that your community had watched most of this unfold, minus the conversation that the two of you had privately, of course. Let’s say that some of them thought that what happened might have been hurtful to them, had they been in your shoes, and they could sympathize and empathize with you, and they spoke up about it, publicly. And so you, wanting to keep the peace, tell them openly that yes, you had initially been hurt, but that you came to an arrangement with the other party, and everything was all good. And then, let’s say another member of the community then chided you for expressing your thoughts, telling you that you shouldn’t be talking about how you feel publicly.

Let’s say that that member of the community went on to say how the other party did so much to “raise the bar” within your community. How they succeeded at everything they put their hand to. How wonderful a person, how helpful, how kind, etc. Let’s say that the one who chided you had nothing but lovely things to say about this other party, and defended them in their actions no matter what they did.

How would you feel? Would you feel small, maybe? Insignificant?

Would you feel as if none of your efforts mattered, at all, because this other party was so amazing, and so wonderful, and “raised the bar”? Would you maybe feel as if you were, not in so many words, perhaps, being told that you just weren’t as awesome as this other party?

I’m just curious, because apparently, I have a responsibility not to talk about how I feel about any of it.